Personal Narrative: Black Holes

Saturday, November 27, 2021 12:46:58 AM

Personal Narrative: Black Holes

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Black hole Firewalls - with Sean Carroll and Jennifer Ouellette

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Oh my God, that was a really naughty. So we were basically able to show that the fractal dimension was the same for all observers. And that you can orient all your interpretations around that invariant. Oh my God. This crazy… And I think you… And I also suffer from this a little bit, which is that in our youngest years being most fascinated with the most abstract, most surreal, maybe not astro physically relevant. So for the audience out there, there are astrophysicists who are, as I keep saying, relatively down to earth, despite doing astrophysics, right? This total… And I love to call it an unrequited love for nature.

But one thing that was verifiable while I was alive, that would feel so good, it would be so fun, it would be very child-like fun. And this was sort of one of those examples, which was black holes have no hair, meaning they cannot support complicated things like magnetic field lines. Black holes though formally proved cannot support the hair of magnetic fields. So I was always confused about that because as you said, neutron stars have these big magnetic fields.

They can be a trillion times that of the earth. And if a black hole swallows one, which we suspect happens quite frequently, what happens to the magnetic field? And there was always this very glib argument. And I think that it, just by not accepting the standard lore and just sort of scratching at it. So I create electricity by waving magnet. And then you lose the chance. I was drawing circuit diagrams for the biggest, most powerful batteries in the universe. Why care about chaos and black holes or electric circuits and black holes? Part of the motivation might be not just…. So we absolutely do this for emotional reasons.

There are no other reasons, right? I learned to write so badly and I saw it and I felt…. What am I doing structurally? That was in some sense more accessible. The unknowability of certain mathematical facts. And so, I threw away an entire book in order to write this other thing which was a novel, which structurally seemed to be truer, which was to say there are some facts we cannot know simply by listing the data in mathematics, we would say the transformation rules from the axioms do not always yield a theorem which is verifiable within the context of that. And so the whole idea of the novel was there are some truths we can only get to by stepping outside, by being fictionalized, or by being a narrative or by being something different.

It was such a pleasure once I… It was a terrible pain before I realized that, but once I made that decision, it just became this fluid, I just knew what I was doing. Well download the audio book right now. Were they close? Did they hang? The code to generate that number is exactly as long as the number. Okay, so it sounds very abstract, but what it means is that there are facts about numbers, simple numbers, numbers between zero and one, about which we will never know anything. And yet is…. And yet, is convicted of homosexuality and given hormone treatments, which leave him depressed and devastated and suicidal.

And so, it is largely believed that he takes his own life. He was obsessed with Snow White, which had recently been aired, was screened. And he bit from a poison apple, an apple that he dipped in cyanide. And so, some people say things like… Which might be apocryphal, but that the Mac symbol of the half-eaten apple, the apple with the bite out of it, is a reference to Turing. And Hilbert calls for a proof that all true facts among the numbers can be proven to be true. And everyone expects that this is true. And his is more…. It would be much worse if one plus one was sometimes two and sometimes three. They come up with all sorts of crazy ideas. He was very isolated and very withdrawn and had strange ideas about the afterlife and….

And then he translated it through a very clever cipher into a purely arithmetic statement that was just like about numbers. And proved that that equation was correct, and therefore unprovable. Which is true. But he, mathematized it perfectly and there it was. So at what point did you say, the right way to tell this story is via a story, via a novel? And that there was something about narrative that allowed you to do exactly that. Do I have permission to do this? Am I gonna get slammed by my colleagues? Is my editor gonna be furious? Is my agent gonna kill me? I mean, these things happen.

So in reality it was all in my mind, basically, the fear. That book was definitely written because I thought we would never know the answer scientifically, and so you know, again…. So this was a question we were asking again because we could, because it was… The math was fun, the math was accessible. Did I… I honestly at no point, working on it scientifically, did I think it was gonna be answered observationally soon…. And if not…. But then you decided to put your personal story in there, right? Is that something that came in later? Did you get resistance from your editor and publisher? And so I think it was much more a clear decision to not write the definitive book of factual information, but to more write about the struggle.

Is this why because you wanted to reflect the sort of psychological state you were in while doing the research? Not to sound authoritative. Why pretend otherwise? Just do it. Just be blunt. And I think it really helped me find the voice for a first book especially where voices… You struggle to find voice. We tell the story how it makes sense, not how it happened. You know the tension, the anxiety, the reality of failure like looming palpably. And to write about him made me incredibly uncomfortable.

And I was trying to bury it. It was like literally like two disconnected pieces jammed together and I took one and I threw it away, and there was the book. And what was amazing is that neither of them told me not to say something. And Rai too. And that quote is in the book. You had this sort of memoir exposition first and then you had a historical novel. Like you are going embedding yourself in the LIGO experiment, talking to people, take… Recording conversations, I presume? I gotta start recording this stuff. Now, I record my conversations. And so, what was… What did you learned by that experience and what was it like to be a journalist?

I mean, I burn water. It was this respect. And so, the journalism was really pleasurable because it was just observing. And hundreds of people, all knowing what to do. They built something real based on things that we do on paper and that connects and just it has my total admiration. Like total admiration. You were there at the different places you visited, field work, et cetera. I really think I was trying to write that book like a novel, that was the target.

The target was Rai as a character. And that it could be fiction, for as long as I can maintain it. It could literally have opened and read as though Rai was a fictitious character with lines. And that came from Rai, that idea because his speech is so spectacular. The rhythm of it, [chuckle] the cadence, the swearing. Who am I to tell their story? Rai tells his story, Kip tells his story, Barry tells his story, even Robbie Vogt, who had a very dark relationship with LIGO at the end, tells his story. And I simply convey as best that I can, what they say. How does the audience receive it? Oh, my God. And it was a really clear decision with Dan, my editor, and I, we talked about it.

And so, can it be conjured up solely with the words? And I think that because people anticipated a non-fiction book, they demanded figures. These books have figures. And I would say that some… Mostly, I feel people really got it. I get it, totally. So, this was a call but that… Most people I feel really got it. They got that it was a climbing Mount Everest story, they got that it was sort of a tragic comedy in some sense, [chuckle] Occasionally it would be totally misunderstood. But they did measure the vibration of a… What is it? The mirrors, at 40 kilograms, Jesus I should know that, I have to read my own book.

What a stunning technological team…. I love that out of the gate, black holes. I did read the book, for those of you out there, in podcast land, how many years of his career was Rai Weiss working on LIGO? I mean 50 years of his life. And you have to remember, and a lot of people think the instrument turned on and it was immediately successful well. In the year , it was running, while those black holes that were detected in were colliding, they were orbiting each other. And it was still too quiet for that very sophisticated instrument between and to detect anything. And the gravitational waves were there and they were washing over the earth and they could not be measured.

And so to be able to move to phase two, the advanced machine. Maybe if they were extremely lucky. I think I heard it attributed to John Wheeler where he would get letters from different crackpots and then he would put them in contact with each other. Like they think that everyone else is also a crackpot except them. Anyway, did we learn something about the efficacy of this kind of way of talking about science, is there something we get at… Science is done by human beings.

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